According to the Mayans we only have one more year left to enjoy rugby. No pressure or anything, but this better be the best f’n year ever for the sport. I mean, it’s not even a World Cup year, nor are the British and Irish Lions touring. So, what should we expect in 2012? I personally predict that the end is not going to come by Earth being sucked into a black hole. We will not meet our doom by an asteroid or micro-planet called “Nibiru” smashing into us. This grand planet will not be demolished by the Solar Maximum causing some sort of magnetic shift that breaks apart the continents. No, we need not fear of any of those things. We should only fear Sébasten Chabal. I know, I know…those of you who have been members of this grand forum for years have heard me preach the good news of Chabal before. I’m right, though. I dare say we should politely ask Racing Metro to not play Seabass on 21 December 2012. For if he decides to unleash his furry on this planet, we’re all screwed!
Imagine if you will the destructive force that Ali Williams’ jaw felt a few years back. Next, take that sum and multiply it by a billion. Okay, now adjust your abacus to factor in the mass of earth [F = G (m1) (m2) / d²] minus the mass of Chabal (17 stone 11 pounds). Multiply that by the furry of Chabal cubed. What you now have is a mathematical nightmare which only proves that we cannot understand the wrath we are going to face.So, as we look towards the New Year with a knowing appreciation for our lives, let us embrace our fellow man (strictly in a platonic sense, of course, unless you are otherwise inclined, which at that point you will be required to present a note of approval from the other party) and make 2012 the best year ever. Get your lazy asses off the couch and onto the pitch nearest you and play, coach or ref some rugby; whether it be union, league or touch.Happy New Year!