Quick Joke

Discussion in 'The Clubhouse Bar' started by Ruff, Aug 26, 2008.

  1. Ruff

    Ruff Guest

    NOTE : Nationalities can be changed to suit your own.


    An Englishman, Irishman and Welshman were caught and taken as POWs to Saddams torture camp in Baghdad.

    Upon arriving, Saddam greets the 3 men and tells them that they will each endure 100 lashes for being enemies of Iraq.

    The Englishman steps up to the whipping area first but Saddam stops him and says "My wife loves the English so I will grant you one wish"

    Quickly thinking, the Englishman asks for a pillow to be strapped to his back. Saddam, true to his word granted it.

    Whilst being a clever countermeasure to the punishment, after 20 odd lashes the whip carved through the pillow leaving the English guy to suffer extreme pain.

    Next up was the Irishman. Saddam also allowed him one wish, as his wife too loved the Irish.

    The Irishman asked for TWO pillows on his back (fecking cunning)

    Again the force of the lashings proved too much for the pillows and cut through easily leaving the poor Irish bloke close to death.

    Now it was the Welshmans turn and Saddam said "My wife loves the Welsh so much that I will grant you 2 wishes"

    Taffy says he wants 200 lashes and looks down at the other 2 mutilated guys without much concern. Saddam is shocked by this but says "OK my son it's up to you, but what is your second wish?"

    "I'll have the Englishman on my back!"...
     
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  3. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    :lol: - that's morbid, but still...
     
  4. Cymro

    Cymro Guest

    :cheers:
     
  5. feicarsinn

    feicarsinn Guest

    not to nitpick but since when were we enemies of the iraqi's
     
  6. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (feicarsinn @ Aug 26 2008, 07:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    If you're talking about Ireland then I have no idea... Didn't you guys join the war? (Probably a silly question...) Also:
    [​IMG]
     
  7. feicarsinn

    feicarsinn Guest

    lol touche nothing like having your neutrality questioned by the welsh kings of war ^_^
     
  8. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    [​IMG]

    Zapp: "I hate these filthy neutrals Kif! With enemies you know where they stand but with neutrals? Who knows! It sickens me."

    Damn those Irish neutrals...
     
  9. Ruff

    Ruff Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (feicarsinn @ Aug 26 2008, 07:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    Again not to nitpick but his mother was from Thailand and his father was Scottish, he was just born in Ireland.
     
  10. Cymro

    Cymro Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (feicarsinn @ Aug 26 2008, 07:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    I could state some facts about various armies in recent times about the Welsh and how many men were killed and supplied by us, and you will find that we supplied more than Ireland did ^_^
     
  11. feicarsinn

    feicarsinn Guest

    we just pick our fights wisely we didnt need to invade iraq neither did you im pretty happy about how we came off
     
  12. Ruff

    Ruff Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (feicarsinn @ Aug 26 2008, 10:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    Don't mean to nitpick Feir, but you chose non invasive targets, nothing more capable than breast feeding and suckling. I'm sure you're happy how you came off.

    Sorry all very sore subject.

    But anyway CHANGING the subject back on to ONTOPIC subject in the OFFTOPIC thread - You wear padding or a man?
     
  13. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Roddy @ Aug 27 2008, 12:08 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    Is that question directed at us? As Lazarus Long said, "He's dead and I'm alive and that's how I wanted it to be."
     
  14. Ruff

    Ruff Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Sir. Speedy @ Aug 27 2008, 12:11 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    Is that question directed at us? As Lazarus Long said, "He's dead and I'm alive and that's how I wanted it to be."
    [/b][/quote]

    You like hand to hand combat or hand to gland? :p
     
  15. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    Depends who I'm fighting. If it's somebody <strike>the same size as me</strike> bigger than me, the latter. If it's a little kid, the former. >______>
     
  16. Ruff

    Ruff Guest

    Hehehehe how u do that cross out stuff - muwahahaa - Although I concur
     
  17. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Roddy @ Aug 27 2008, 12:23 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    <strike>I'll tell you if you rob a bank, give me the money and never speak of it again...</strike> You just type [ s ] 'text here' [ / s ] <=== without the spaces.
     
  18. Ruff

    Ruff Guest

    <strike> Money is on way but you need to give me some OFFSHORE bank details - ALSO is it only us Welsh that can read this crossed off ****? </strike>
     
  19. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Roddy @ Aug 27 2008, 12:35 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    <strike>It appears so mate. Hey, I have an idea; lets swear at and conspire against the admins using this crossed thing - they'll never know... teehee. </strike> :p
     
  20. Ruff

    Ruff Guest

    <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Sir. Speedy @ Aug 27 2008, 12:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>
    <strike>It appears so mate. Hey, I have an idea; lets swear at and conspire against the admins using this crossed thing - they'll never know... teehee. </strike> :p
    [/b][/quote]

    <strike> Hey speedy dunno if you watched OLD SCHOOL but " Yer ma boy blue!" those Englite TW@s thinks they got Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch sussed</strike>
     
  21. Sir Speedy

    Sir Speedy Guest

    ^Nope, but the wonder that is Youtube just showed me what you're talking about. :lol: Will Ferrell ftw - but that's for a different thread... >.>
    EDIT: I have no idea what you just said in Welsh - you'd never guess that I had a C in my Welsh GCSE, I absolutely suck at it. >_>
     
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