Quotes of 2008

[Steve-o]

http://www.planet-rugby.com/Story/0,18259,...4721038,00.html
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Another year of rugby draws to a close, but the classic lines - and clangers - are still ringing in our ears. Scroll to the foot of the page to find out who was responsible for the following gems...

A: "I have many emotions about my time with England, but that's a story for another time. It's a closed chapter and I'm now looking forward to a new and very broad challenge here at the University of Bath."

B: "I want to be honest with South Africa and say that the appointment was not entirely made for rugby reasons."

C: "That's buried now. That's buried with the Grand Slam."

D: When you're down on the ground and you start thinking about your wife and children it means it's time to stop."

E: "He's a young, good-looking fella. He's rich and he's going to be a global superstar. He's also going out with Kelly Brook. To be honest with you, we're queuing around the block to buy Josh a pint."

F: "It's difficult to explain how gutted we are at that, simply because of the amount of work that's gone in. I'm not just talking about last week, I'm talking behind the scenes, I'm talking over the years, the battle we've had since professionalism began to cling on to our place at the top table with our resources. It's a massive battle that we've faced over a last few years and I felt that, slowly but surely, we had been winning that battle."

G: "Bryan Habana likes to talk himself up before games and then nothing happens."

H: "You said last week that daft decisions were to blame for the defeat to Australia, yet a lot of the mistakes this week looked very familiar. Were England daft today? The definition of daftness is making the same mistakes repeatedly. So, Martin, were you daft today?"

I: "My dresser and I have the hots for the new rugby ace Danny Cipriani. We have a shrine in my dressing room - press photos of him on the field looking swarthy and fit, and snaps of our boy emerging from Mayfair nightclubs, looking sexy and dishevelled."

J: "If you want to run with the big dogs you've got to lift a leg."

K: "I know people in the media have said it's time for me to go, that I am either up or down. How do I react? You learn you are going to be on the end of praise and criticism. It never stops.''

L: "We don't like each other. They don't like us either. They're not totally at fault, at times we've given them reason not to like us. It's not one way, the trappiness. We're both passionate about rugby and it's not a bad thing to have teams who care about playing for their country."

M: "He has a lot of character, I've a lot of time for him. He'll put his big chin out, take it on the chin and get on with it."

N: ''He was ridiculous and grotesque. His behaviour is offensive and against the rules. He is a clown.''

O: "Je suis Dan."

P: "My England man put rampant rabbits to shame."

Q: "No doubt in the past, England players on tour have stayed out too late, drunk excessive quantities of alcohol, invited guests back to the team hotel and missed physiotherapist appointments or training the next morning, but such activity is now inconsistent with the life of an elite professional rugby player in the modern era."

R: "If you look at the Bible and see how Joseph got out of the pit and ended up in the palace, but between the pit and the palace there was a moerse lot of kak."

S: "I felt extra pressure on me today, it was like my first day at school."

T: "Great rugby is about courage and character. I'd like to dedicate today's win to someone else with great courage and character, Alastair Hignell."

U: "How could I possibly be accused of an anti-Afrikaans attitude when my maternal grandmother is a Van Rensburg, my paternal great-grandmother was a Schoeman and my aunt is a Swanepoel?"

V: "We were talking about the game last week - he reckoned it will be quite easy this week, but I don't know about that."

W: "I've never been so scared in my life."

X: "If I wasn't playing for the All Blacks, if I was playing for Southland or maybe the Highlanders, maybe I'd have thrown a couple."

Y: "They defend a lead like my mum pole vaults."

Z: "I was disappointed that some of the suggestions I emailed to the IRB appear not to have been considered worthy of even a trial in the Welsh fourth division. These include scrums instead of kick-offs, scrums instead of line-outs, scrums instead of backs moves and the outlawing of any hair product. I don't know where our game is heading but I'm sure it's going to be a place that doesn't welcome fat, slow old people with no hair. I'll get my coat."

ANSWERS:

A: Unlike his former employers, sacked England coach Brian Ashton shows some class.

B: SA Rugby president Oregan Hoskins spells it out after announcing Peter De Villiers as the new Bok boss.

C: The recent wins against the Home Nations have exorcised New Zealand's host of World Cup ghosts, or so believes AB hooker Keven Mealamu.

D: France prop Pieter de Villiers decides to hang up his boots.

E: Former Wasps skipper Lawrence Dallaglio gives his verdict after Josh Lewsey laid out Danny Cipriani in a training ground bust-up.

F: Scotland coach Frank Hadden is in danger of suffering a teary Gavin Hastings moment in wake of the reversal to South Africa.

G: Former Australia star David Campese finds a new victim to pick on.

H: Sky reporter Graeme Simmons somehow avoids a slap from Martin Johnson in the wake of England's record defeat to South Africa.

I: England rugby's new pin-up boy would be advised to stir clear of actor Julian Clary.

J: Bok boss Peter de Villiers dumbfounds the media after the Boks scored a surprise win over New Zealand in Wellington.

K: England star Jonny Wilkinson adopts a new edge as doubts about his future emerge.

L: Matches between Ireland and Argentina have acquired plenty of baggage in recent years, a fact not lost on Ireland lock Donncha O'Callghan.

M: New Zealand coach Graham Henry backs under-fire England manager Martin Johnson.

N: England hooker Mark Regan got up the nose of France coach Marc Lièvremont during the Six Nations.

O: New Zealand star Dan Carter reveals the extent of his French after arriving in Perpignan. With the town festooned with billboards bearing his image and name, "je suis Dan" is perhaps the one phrase he could do without.

P: Angel Barbie, one of the girls 'entertained' by England's finest in Auckland, is quids in after selling her story to the tabloids.

Q: RFU disciplinary officer Jeff Blackett attempts to draw a line under the off-field shenanigans that blighted England's tour of New Zealand.

R: More resplendent imagery from Bok boss Peter de Villiers - this one coming after the All Blacks nilled the Boks in Cape Town.

S: New Zealand star Dan Carter on his Perpignan debut.

T: Former Wasps captain Lawrence Dallaglio pays tribute to retiring BBC commentator Alastair Hignell, who is suffering from multiple sclerosis, after hoisting the Guinness Premiership trophy.

U: Stormers star Luke Watson mounts the case for the defence after allegedly declaring that the "dutchmen" who run South African rugby made him want to vomit on the Springbok jersey. Yep, only in South Africa!

V: New Zealand captain Richie McCaw reveals that Prince Philip was backing the opposition in the build-up to New Zealand's game against England at Twickenham. All marbles still present and correct, then.

W: Quins scrum-half Danny Care reflects after his premature celebrations in Paris resulted in a penalty to Stade Français in the shadow of Harlequins' sticks. Luckily for Care, the Londoners managed to hold on for a famous victory.

X: New Zealand scrum-half Jimmy Cowan accuses England of slowing ruck-ball during the November Tests - but was he talking punches or toys?

Y: Former Wales skipper Gwyn Jones lays into the Scarlets after they lost 29-22 to Harlequins after taking a 19-3 lead into the break.

Z: Leicester Tigers hooker George Chuter is clearly not a fan of the ELVs.[/b]