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<blockquote data-quote="Dumbo" data-source="post: 63077"><p>Mate is this the **** that the powers that be in the Great NZ social welfare state are making you learn?</p><p></p><p>For real?... look don't get me wrong - that's a good effort about historical events that have shaped the world as we know it but man... for real?</p><p></p><p>Ok... good portrayal of content (regardless of the subject matter) and a clean delivery, but watch your wording on this bit...</p><p></p><p>"The uprising and independence of Belgium resulted in a sudden change in the lives of ordinary people in Belgium as a new government was formed to set laws that encourage growth <strong>in</strong> Belgium and supported the lifestyle the ordinary people of Belgium wanted. They no longer suffered the restrictions imposed on them by the Dutch and lived <strong>a butch </strong>better life."</p><p></p><p>You need to fix that up before you submit and also flesh it out... if you make a statement back it up with a least one example of how this was achieved... people that mark exams will be looking for it (and sadly they are only dickheads so don't expect them to be bright... spell it out simple and slow and you can't go wrong).</p><p></p><p>Good work all in all, be careful though... if you are going to make a statement that represents a fact you want to back it up with an example that enforces your opinion.</p><p></p><p>The sad thing is... is that the subject matter that NZ youth is judged upon? shithouse... they gave me the NZ Social Welfare state and there of... the destruction of the Kiwi identity in the world economy.</p><p></p><p>Bad luck ripper, the good news is though... one day it's over and you get to prove yourself in more rewarding areas.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dumbo, post: 63077"] Mate is this the **** that the powers that be in the Great NZ social welfare state are making you learn? For real?... look don't get me wrong - that's a good effort about historical events that have shaped the world as we know it but man... for real? Ok... good portrayal of content (regardless of the subject matter) and a clean delivery, but watch your wording on this bit... "The uprising and independence of Belgium resulted in a sudden change in the lives of ordinary people in Belgium as a new government was formed to set laws that encourage growth [b]in[/b] Belgium and supported the lifestyle the ordinary people of Belgium wanted. They no longer suffered the restrictions imposed on them by the Dutch and lived [b]a butch [/b]better life." You need to fix that up before you submit and also flesh it out... if you make a statement back it up with a least one example of how this was achieved... people that mark exams will be looking for it (and sadly they are only dickheads so don't expect them to be bright... spell it out simple and slow and you can't go wrong). Good work all in all, be careful though... if you are going to make a statement that represents a fact you want to back it up with an example that enforces your opinion. The sad thing is... is that the subject matter that NZ youth is judged upon? shithouse... they gave me the NZ Social Welfare state and there of... the destruction of the Kiwi identity in the world economy. Bad luck ripper, the good news is though... one day it's over and you get to prove yourself in more rewarding areas. [/QUOTE]
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