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The Clubhouse Bar
Joke thread
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<blockquote data-quote="Black|Raven" data-source="post: 33729"><p>One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike, "My elbow hurts like crazy. I guess I better see a doctor."</p><p>"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.</p><p>"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.</p><p>It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars... a lot cheaper than a doctor."</p><p>So Joe puts a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.</p><p>Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:</p><p>"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart."</p><p>That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.</p><p>He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurried back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results.</p><p>He deposited ten dollars, poured in his concoction, and awaited the results.</p><p>The computer then prints the following:</p><p></p><p>1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)</p><p></p><p>2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)</p><p></p><p>3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.</p><p></p><p>4. Your wife is pregnant, Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer</p><p></p><p>5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your tennis elbow will never get better!</p><p></p><p>Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart <img src="http://www.therugbyforum.com/forum/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" alt="" class="fr-fic fr-dii fr-draggable " style="" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Black|Raven, post: 33729"] One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike, "My elbow hurts like crazy. I guess I better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars... a lot cheaper than a doctor." So Joe puts a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart." That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurried back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposited ten dollars, poured in his concoction, and awaited the results. The computer then prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant, Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer 5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your tennis elbow will never get better! Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart [img]http://www.therugbyforum.com/forum/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif[/img] [/QUOTE]
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