Quick Joke

[feicarsinn]

not happy bout the way this thread went at all i want to rant about how great ireland is again but ah well

 

[sambãd5]

ok sort of back on topic, if there ever was a topic...

had a regular at work come up to me and say "sam, i went skydiving with a few of me mates the other day. and what they do is for each jumper, they have two lights, a red one, to get ready and go up to the opening in the plane, and a green one, to jump out. and they do it in tandums, so the first guy with his instructer get the red light, go up to the opening, and looking very very nervous get the green light, and whoop. they jump out. then my regular goes, ok... even more nervous. gets the red light. gets to the door and goes. nup. noooooo way. there is not a chance that your going to get me out of this plane. not a snowballs chance in hell. its simply not a happening thing. but the instructor who was strapped to his back was a big black hairy male, and he wispers in his ear. "If you dont jump out of this plane im going to f*** you up the ass"

and so i said to my regular at work "oh so did you jump?"
he replies "A little bit at first"

 

[Jer1cho]

A horse walks into a bar..... . . .. . . . . .. . . .. bump

 

[Fa'atau82]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div>

A horse walks into a bar..... . . .. . . . . .. . . .. bump[/b]

O hai camilla parker-bowles, why the long face?

Saddam's actual words about Wales when asked in the hague.. 'Get some vowels you stupid fcuking leeksuckers.'

 

[Ruff]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Fa'atau82 @ Aug 27 2008, 02:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE

A horse walks into a bar..... . . .. . . . . .. . . .. bump[/b]

Saddam's actual words about Wales when asked in the hague.. 'Get some vowels you stupid fcuking leeksuckers.'
[/b][/quote]

Muwhaha

 

[Fa'atau82]

I know only one welsh word/phrase 'Bwrw' which is pronounced 'booroo'. It means rain. Ok, maybe a couple more if you count.. cymru, rygbi and gvnhnsn isatwt.

Bwrw. That'd come in handy on a date with Sian Lloyd.. i could say 'O hai rhombus face, look it's bwrwing outside'.. i think she'd be highly impressed. Until i mentioned i was off to date the other 'cheeky' girl because i don't like rhombus-faced munters. I like her really.

 

[steynboi]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Roddy @ Aug 26 2008, 07:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}></div>

NOTE : Nationalities can be changed to suit your own.


An Englishman, Irishman and Welshman were caught and taken as POWs to Saddams torture camp in Baghdad.

Upon arriving, Saddam greets the 3 men and tells them that they will each endure 100 lashes for being enemies of Iraq.

The Englishman steps up to the whipping area first but Saddam stops him and says "My wife loves the English so I will grant you one wish"

Quickly thinking, the Englishman asks for a pillow to be strapped to his back. Saddam, true to his word granted it.

Whilst being a clever countermeasure to the punishment, after 20 odd lashes the whip carved through the pillow leaving the English guy to suffer extreme pain.

Next up was the Irishman. Saddam also allowed him one wish, as his wife too loved the Irish.

The Irishman asked for TWO pillows on his back (fecking cunning)

Again the force of the lashings proved too much for the pillows and cut through easily leaving the poor Irish bloke close to death.

Now it was the Welshmans turn and Saddam said "My wife loves the Welsh so much that I will grant you 2 wishes"

Taffy says he wants 200 lashes and looks down at the other 2 mutilated guys without much concern. Saddam is shocked by this but says "OK my son it's up to you, but what is your second wish?"

"I'll have the Englishman on my back!"...[/b]

omfg LOL!