in the North West of England at 6:00am on Friday. Fantastic. Just 6 months ago, the region suffered record snowfall, just two months before that there was flooding, yet the numbskulls at United Utilities can't cope with a bit of dryness. Admittedly, it's the driest start to a summer since 1929 but there is never any excuse for a hosepipe ban in my opinion. And now you'll have to excuse me - I'm off to put my hosepipe on until 5:59am on Friday.