Snakes on a Plane

Discussion in 'The Clubhouse Bar' started by kaftka, Aug 22, 2006.

  1. kaftka

    kaftka Guest

    My god I hate Hollywood.










    SNAKES ON A PLANE!!!!!!!











    Discuss.
     
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  3. Caledfwlch

    Caledfwlch Guest

    theres a huge mitake in tt movie. the plan leaves the honolulu int airport, and snakes atart to appear on the plane. but the fact of the matter is this, there are absolutely ZERO snakes in hawaii
     
  4. InsaneAsylum

    InsaneAsylum Guest

    stupid concept, stupid movie
     
  5. Ripper

    Ripper Guest

    :huh:
    Correct me if i'm wrong, but is it not possible that the Mafia person who released them on the plane could've bought the Snakes to Hawaii?
     
  6. Caledfwlch

    Caledfwlch Guest

    oh yeah. that skipped my mind. i suppose u could make a hollywood producer then.
     
  7. woosaah

    woosaah Guest

    this movie is starting to remind me of anaconda :) i thought that movie was goign to be good, but was crap, this looks intense, but will end up crap
     
  8. BigTen

    BigTen Guest

    I thought that this sounded odd so I did a google search and came up with this.

    http://www.explorebiodiversity.com/Hawaii/...iles/Snakes.htm

    So Hawaii does have snakes - just not very many of them.

    The movie apparently is supposed to be pretty good. Better than Miami Vice anyway.
     
  9. loratadine

    loratadine Guest

    OMG LIGHTEN UP, ITS SAMUEL L.JACKSON, KILLING SNAKES, WITH CHEESEY ONE LINERS, not the snakes of course. this will be a cult film, treat it as a joke, and a comedy youll find ull enjoy it much more you cultrual deserts.
     
  10. getofmeland

    getofmeland Guest

    Well said!!!
     
  11. ak47

    ak47 Guest

    1ST time i heard about this i thought it was 'Sex on a plane' - would make a better movie

    not seeing this - even if i am paid
     
  12. MonoTurd

    MonoTurd Guest

    lol how much did the producer pay you to say that?

    we all know its gonna be a crappy movie but it will make a butt-load at the boxoffice because of its huge publicity.

    the concept of the movie is that snakes get released on a plane. thats just as lame as the concept for the game "Demonik" from Grandmas Boy which is: a demon sent from hell to bring down a meth lab.
     
  13. Ripper

    Ripper Guest

    But it has Samuel Jackson in it... So it's going to have some awesome lines.

    And remember Kids - Recycling = Bad.
     
  14. dobrien7

    dobrien7 Guest

    They are harking back to the 70s with a "so bad it's good" movie. I for one am interested in it.
     
  15. MonoTurd

    MonoTurd Guest

    "... and you use this bin for slightly soiled toilet paper"

    or something similar to that. my god it was funny watching them put all those extra recycling bins outside and telling them to put such stupid things in :lol:
     
  16. Ripper

    Ripper Guest

    Finally - SOMEONE ELSE WHO WATCHES PENN AND TELLER : BULLSHIT!
     
  17. kaftka

    kaftka Guest

    It's on way too late.


    Anyway, I wouldn't mind seeing snakes on a Plane... But I'm not going to pay for it.

    A modern day Plan 9?
     
  18. Bullitt

    Bullitt Guest

    Original article

    Moog's Moovies - Snakes On A Plane

    [​IMG]

    Orange have decided that they would pay us to go watch and review films for them every month. This is pretty cool for us and hopefully you lot too since you get stuff to read and we get to go watch films. Can't be bad. At least not if you're me.

    You're not me are you? No? Oh good.

    Well, to get the ball rolling how could I choose to watch anything other than the film that has become an internet meme, made it's way into common day parlance and, if you believe the more cynical among us (We're looking at you Rob Manuel), jumped the shark all before it has even been released.

    Snakes on a Plane was intended to be renamed 'Pacific Air Flight 121' before Jackson made possibly the best decision of this film's life and demanded that it was released under the original working title, quoted as saying "We're totally changing that back. That's the only reason I took the job: I read the title.". What could be regarded as an act of typical actor-style kookiness was instead embraced by internet communities everywhere who revel in the absurd and bizarre. Jackson's cooler-than-frozen-fonz persona had turned what could have been a laughable disaster into this year's most talked about release.

    The plot, (bless) is thus: Bloke witnesses his dad getting murdered in Hawaii by some other crime-type bloke. Witness-bloke agrees to testify in LA accompanied by FBI-bloke (Jackson), making crime-bloke resort to trying to bump him off with a lot of snakes. (How he reached this 'logical' conclusion I'll never know.) Cut to a plane with witness-bloke on, lots of people and a ******* load of ****** off snakes.

    [​IMG]

    I was fully prepared, sat in my comfy little seat with my big tub of popcorn and smuggled in Dr Pepper, to complain and scoff my way through this film with loud comments as I left about how I'll never get those two hours back. How delightfully cynical I would have been! However, I'm glad to report (thanks to my ability to shut most of my brain down) that I absolutely enjoyed this film to bits.

    It reminded me of a kind of hybrid between Airplane and a disaster movie from the seventies. So that would be a parody of disaster movies from the 70's and an actual disaster movie from the seventies (Take your pick. My choice is Towering Inferno!) which is a bit like saying it reminded me of Scream and Scary Movie. However I digress for the reasoning behind this is about to become clear! Why did it remind me of a genre and a parody of said genre? Mainly because I was able to play one of my favourite film games - You're Going To Die. I'm sure you've played it before, but if not, here are the rules:

    1) Extend pointing finger.
    2) Point at each character.
    3) If you believe they are fodder, exclaim 'Dead!' in an excited manner!
    4) If you seriously believe they have enough character development to survive, explain yourself. You may then secretly wish death upon them.
    5) Feel smug.

    If (like me) you're the kind of person who relishes the goriest of on-screen deaths, then this film will leave you giddy with joy. Pretty much every aspect of snake-related carnage is covered as passengers are bumped off at a rate of knots, moreoften than not in a gruesomely hilarious fashion.

    So, what makes this film the enjoyable pap it is?

    * Snakes? Partly.
    * The plane? HELL YES! Oh wait... No.
    * Jackson...?

    Well, let's see with my exciting moviegraph-o-meter! This week I am plotting TIME against Samuel L. Jackson's AWESOMENESS:

    [​IMG]

    1) "Don't even breathe."
    2) "Sporks?"
    3) "I've had it with these m****r fuc*ing snakes on this m****r f*cking plane!"
    4) "Stings, don't it?"
    5) Surfuel L. Jackson (This made me choke on my Nobby's nuts.)

    Look at that! That's a bucketload of AWESOME!

    Snakes on a Plane does exactly what it says on the tin; It's snakes on a plane, but happily there's a healthy smattering of Wonderfulitiness. It could have been better in places, (The CGI snakes spring to mind like a poorly rendered cobra.) but overall it remains charming, silly fun that doesn't need any brainpower to be enjoyed (Like a midnight donkey ride).

    If you don't enjoy it, and I'm sure some of you won't, just remember this: at least Owen *ucki*g Wilson isn't in it. That man is like some kind of low fat spread at a Weight Watchers scone tasting night.

    [​IMG]
     
  19. kaftka

    kaftka Guest

    Cool.
     
  20. loratadine

    loratadine Guest

    ive had it wif these muther f***ing snakes ha ha ha

    pls see this as a comedy

    funniest film in years

    thankyou slj
     
  21. el_tk

    el_tk Guest

    Absolutley brilliant, with some great one liners.
     
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