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The modern History of English Rugby

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Bullitt

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We all know the North East is the hotbead of socialism in politics, but in Sport it's a very different story...

Before SCW stepped down and away from England all together, he originally proposed a "Director of Rugby" role for him to move up to and have a head coach report directly to him. Many were keen on this idea, but of the few against it, Rob Andrew was the noisiest about what was wrong with his ideas. Eventually SCW got sick and tired of the backstabbing and pettiness of the RFU and as we all know, sensationally walked out within weeks of the world cup win.

This left Andy Robinson in charge, although the sound of Rob Andrew bleating for an RFU job was never far away. When Francis Baron suggested central contracts for the elite squad, Rob Andrew agreed. When Barwell, Duckworth, Walkinshaw and the other club owners complained about losing players, Andrew sided with the RFU. The more disruption it caused and the Louder Rob Andrew got, the worse things got.

Things came to a head in 2005 when Andrew pushed & pushed for a youngster in his squad to be given his international debut. At 18 years old and a meagre 13 stone, he was described by his club coach as the next Wonder kid in world rugby and, despite only 120 minutes professional experience behind him, was thrown into the starting line-up against Wales in Cardiff up against . We all know how that went. He would then spend the next 18 months swanning off on the 7s circuit. To this day, Matthew Tait still hasn't lived up to his billing of the "next great star in rugby".

After that debacle, Andrew now fully in the pocket of Francis Baron, he appointed himself as Elite Director of Rugby for England, basically becoming judge, jury and executioner for the whole of England rugby. Whatever Andy Robinson did from now on in didn't matter, as Andrew had the last word. England reverted to 10 man rugby(very much in the Newcastle ethos of playing) and were rubbish until the end of the 2006 Autumn internationals. Goodbye Andy Robinson.

Come the 2007 Six Nations there's a new coach, Wilko is back and it's the Calcutta cup (against a very poor Scotland) at Twickenham. "Wilko has a blinder" (lies) and "England are back" are the headlines as the Newcastle 10 combo are hailed as heroes. It's a different story against Wales and Ireland, who were equally rubbish, but hey! Wilko is the king, remember?

We'll forget the fiasco of the Summer SA tour and the Rob Andrew selection machine which read Newcastle Player, Newcastle Player, Newcastle Player, Newcastle Player, Newcastle Player, Newcastle Player and Mark Regan.

Come World Cup time and England are awful against USA and the Boks using a 10-man style of play, somewhat familiar to anyone who's seen Newcastle play before. So an Italian, a South African, a cockney big mouth and Martin Corry decide to take over and run the England setup themselves. "Get lost Ashton, Get lost Andrew, you're doing it wrong, we're doing it ourselves" was the message.

England somehow battled throughout the tournament somehow reaching the final, despite having no real structure to their play and the only tactic apparently being "Concede less then we score". It nearly worked and the world was briefly fooled into thinking England are worthy of their top 3 world ranking place. We are promised wholesale changes throughout the playing staff.

Back home after the tournament and come the 6 nations, some changes are made... To the training squad. The first XV is alarmingly familiar. In fact, the only real change was Balshaw in for Lewsey- That'll learn 'im for going against Rob Andrew in France. Also familiar was the awful rugby displayed.

England are beat, at home, by a Welsh side who had not found their rhythm and in fact at that point of the tournament, weren't very good at all.

An undeserved win against the Italians, a lucky win against the French, an unsurprising loss against the Scottish and a big win over an awful Ireland later and not much has changed. Either since the World Cup Final in Paris or since 2004.

My crystal ball tells me that a naff squad will be taken to NZ for the 1st Summer test and England will be annihilated, despite the AB's missing half their key players, Wilkinson, Flood, Noon, Tait and maybe John Rudd leading English the charge. England will return home, having lost many places in the world rankings, and Brian Ashton will be sacked. Another yes man will come in and report directly to Rob Andrew and the whole process will be repeated all over again.
 
England will get well and truly dicked in NZ.

Wasn't there rumours of at least two clubs 'encouraging' their players to give England a miss because the substandard coaching would destroy their chances of making the Lions tour?
 
England will get well and truly dicked in NZ.
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I'll rephrase that to avoid hurting anyones sensibilites...

IMO an England side minus many of it's star players and experienced heads will suffer at the hands of a NZ side picking from nearly full strength options and honed to great fitness as a result of a season playing under the new ELV's.
 
Nah, I prefer the original phrasing.

Problem with the prediction about the NZ tour is that Teh Mite has been banging on about England's strength in the Saxon's squad - if he's right, then the absence of premiership stars could be really useful for England, and maybe a bit shocking for NZ.

Here's hoping - forza Englandia!
 
Woot, Shtoves talking up the English, expect to see a scoreline of around 47-3.

And the All Blacks will hardly be the raging machine they were over 2005-2006, it's probably going to be a mini-1998, at least early on this season (of course, without the 5 straight losses) in terms of having to re-tool and replace the retirements/players gone overseas. I expect a season similar to 2004 - spank the North still but have to battle through the Tri Nations.
 

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